Thursday, February 16, 2012

Again with the almost-cancer



We haven’t made it to the desert with our trailer this year because I’ve been stuck in town with a series of doctors’ appointments and tests.  It takes forever to get in to see a specialist, even in ours, the greatest healthcare system in the world.  Resulta que I haven’t been able to move forward and get this thing taken care of, but I also haven’t had enough time between appointments to head south, even for a few weeks. 

(In fact, Mary and I made a break for it last Sunday and were headed to Death Valley for ten days or so, but at our first stop in Fallon, Nevada, we couldn’t get the slide to work on our trailer.  We decided to drive back home and get it taken care of at our local dealer.  Turned out to be a loose wire.)

Like my run-in with prostate cancer a few years ago, I now have an “inconclusive” test result indicating I either do or do not have thyroid cancer.  And as with prostate cancer, it doesn’t much matter.  Early stage thyroid cancer is almost completely curable, but if it turns out to be benign, they often recommend surgery anyway.  In my case, they’ll probably remove half my thyroid and biopsy that.  If it turns out to be malignant, I get a second surgery to remove the other half.  I assume there is no discount for the second surgery. 

Fortunately, thyroid surgery is considered minor and I should be out of the hospital the next day and back to normal in a few days rather than weeks or months.  This my doctor assures me.  Easy for him to say. 

This is all good news: the early CT scan and ultrasound indicated only that I had a mass somewhere in my throat, which could have been one of the bad ones.  I had to wait a month to see the first specialist, who assured me this was all about the thyroid and I could relax.  I managed to not think about it too much during the month, although I had to fight against blaming myself for my near-lifetime battle with nicotine addiction, which is generally summarized as twenty-five years of heavy smoking, fifteen years of non-smoking, and now another fifteen or so of occasionally smoking. 

Again, I blame my parents.

At any rate, the thought of losing my voice and/or breathing through a hole in my throat got my attention, and I think this time I can actually stay off the fags.  Thank you Jesus for nicotine patches during the rough patches.  Also, gum. 

To be honest, though, I did spend at least some time thinking that this could be it and asking myself if I’ve had a good life, if I have any regrets, if I could face this.  The answers were all positive, but then the question wasn’t yet real, was it?  

6 comments:

Jason Appah said...

Jimny Ross! I hope and pray for a speedy and negative diagnosis! I wondered why you hadn't made the trek to NM.

Good luck getting off the Lung Darts; more importantly let me know if there is anything I can do to help. If you need someone to have an "accident" after stiffing you on a poker debt.. I am you guy :)

Mary said...

Everything I try to write sounds trite...so, I'll only say: I love you honey.

Jillybejoyful said...

I've thoroughly enjoyed the posts I've read of yours (I come via Mary), and even a potentially dark one like this leaves me feeling refreshed and positive.

May you continue writing your delightful stories for many years to come, and in good health. :)

Witch Hazel said...

Dear Ross,
You don't know me, but I know your wife online. :) I'm sorry to hear about all of your recent health issues, but I'm so glad to hear that even if it is cancer, it is a very curable/operable kind.
I struggled with nicotine addiction myself for a long time. Quit, start up, try and cut back, etc. I have been cig free for almost 6 years now, though. It is a struggle, but I bet you can do it!

I have been unable to post anything on your wife's blog for ages (since blogger made the format changes a few months back), but I'd also really appreciate it if you could pass that along, with this message as well.

I wish you and your DH the best in these trying times. I'm glad it is operable, and looks less serious than originally thought! It must have been hard not having anyone outside the situation to talk to about it.
37 years is such a great accomplishment, and I know what you mean about compromises. I've only been married to my DH for 9 years (+3 living together before that), but we've already been over some tough hurdles and found ways to live with each others little foibles. It can be difficult and a lot of work, but almost all things worthwhile are. Also, love the picture of you 2 in Mexico, you are a beautiful couple. :)
You guys only live a few hours from us now. I hope we get a chance to meet up someday!

Best wishes and good health to both of you!
Linda

Jason Appah said...

I had no idea, I hope everything turns out ok, and seriously tell me if there is anything I can do.

ross said...

Thanks to all for the kind wishes. I kind of kept this private mostly because it's really a minor issue and I didn't want to be a drama boy.

I'll know next week when I go in. In lieu of flowers, please send money.