I am Joe's prostate update

I'm doing mostly fine emotionally and scheduled for surgery next Wednesday. Things are still up in the air, though, because I'm "equivocal for distal anterior cerebral artery aneurisms." Sounds scary as hell, don’t it? but my family doctor tells me my heart health is probably good and I'm fit for surgery (probably). I’m “equivocal” because I have a “branch bundle blockage,” which is “not a nerve but it’s like a nerve” in my heart which is causing an irregular heartbeat. A BBB is not itself a problem but can mask other conditions. It’s up to me, the doc says, and since I happen to be a heart surgeon in my spare time, I feel well qualified to make a decision.

Or maybe it’s a bundle branch blockage. . . . Beach blanket bingo. . . . Bleach banquet bunko. Anyway, it’s not a nerve.

I'm waiting to hear back from the surgeon if he's willing to go ahead. I have a pre-op appointment Monday and may not know more until then. Urologists don't seem great about returning calls. My friend John has had the same problem.

I feel really bad for John. We're calling and emailing a lot since we're kind of doing this on the buddy system. John didn't get good news after surgery, and although his prognosis is still good, he has more therapy, side effects, and uncertainty ahead. The emotional effects for him and his family are tough, but he’s a tough guy. Hang in, John!

Me, I’m a weenie.

I’ve found the best way to handle this is to spend a lot of money on myself. I bought some flashy new leathers to assure myself of my virility in case I have erectile issues after surgery. Actually, every guy has erectile issues after surgery, but there are many therapies available to help Willie stand tall again, some of which sound damn fun. You wouldn’t believe what some guys will do to get a boner. I’m looking for a good source for powdered rhinoceros horn.

Then I bought a new helmet, which I actually did need. Then I bought a new watch since ten years on a $40 Timex is enough self-denial. I can’t think of anything else to buy right now, but I’m sure I’ll come up with something.

The support of friends and the kindness of strangers, especially cute nurses, has meant everything to me. If you’re wondering what you can do to help, send me presents. Send Mary some presents, too. Talk about cute nurses.